The one that gets all of the looks and stares along with the occasional snide comment...
Like today at the library, while my 2 year screamed (and do I mean SCREAMED) through the whole process of getting a prize at the kids desk to check out...all while my 3 year old had no shorts on and wet underwear because he aimed very poorly in the bathroom and I had no extra clothes...Yeah "THAT" mom.
But while I endure the stares and the looks, and patiently take in the comments...inside I'm falling apart. This is hard. I know my toddler's tantrum is hurting your ears, it hurts mine too. I know my child is not wearing shorts, but he didn't leave the house that way.
What they don't know is that I'm doing the best I can. This is a hard job all by yourself, while your husband is half-way around the world. That I don't have family near-by to step in as back-up. That at the end of a long day, I just wish my husband was here to hug me and tell me it's all right...or at least that skype would work and we could connect. I wish that next time instead of looks of judgement that I might get ones of compassion. We never know what someone might be dealing with at home.
I promise I am not always so negative in my blog posts (look back to last year), and I don't like being a "Debbie Downer", but I needed to share my heart today. And I know many have it harder than I because their husband is not ever going to be coming back, but today I am just tired and I miss the other part that makes me whole...and I know my kids miss him too!
6 comments:
Oh, I wish I could be there to give you a hug. I'm proud of you for getting out of the house! So sorry there wasn't a more compassionate person to give you a knowing smile or a helpful hand.
You can vent and share your feelings to us anytime- no need for apologies!
Love you, friend!
~amber
Thanks for sharing this post. And like Amber, I'm sorry you didn't encounter someone who had a heart. Wish we were all with you to help out during this time. Love and prayers.
Be proud that you are a patient, loving, caring mother! When you get the stares and remarks, just smile at those idiots that don't understand and pray for God's patience and peace. God chose YOU for a very special reason - because you CAN deal with these boys with love and caring (and not with screams, recriminations, and violence as some in this world might). We LOVE you and though you didn't know what was ahead, God does and HE will provide all your needs, even a shoulder to cry on.
xox
Mom
Of course you are hurting, sweet friend. Never feel bad about sharing your heart. Love you and will be praying for you. You can e-mail me to complain ANYTIME. No judgement here. : )
Hey, guess what? I'm THAT mom too! Believe me, I get the stares. But after 16 years of being a mom, I am so past worrying about them. What matters most is that you really are doing your best, and that's all you can do. I'm right there with ya!
I remember when I was single and looked at THAT mom (or dad) with the annoying kid in public, I thought they should just control THAT kid... Yes Dena and I are parents of THAT/ THOSE kids too. Then I remember the people with the judgmental eyes are annoyed because their subconscious is showing them flashbacks of who they were when their mom took them out in public. I bet I made my mom's life hell at moments... but remember it is just a moment, it is a whole life we are working on, not just wet pants and some screams. Now if you'll excuse me I think I need to go yell at my kids. “Hey! STOP touching her, DON’T push him. Your head is not a weapon, NO peeing on Dora!”
-Boyd
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